today i am officially calling this over. i haven't heard anything from brian in a few weeks, which is a VERY long time for him to go without contacting me. i don't think about him anymore until something reminds me of him. i don't miss him anymore. now, over a year after we finally ended our relationship, it's truly over.
that isn't to say that there aren't permanent consequences. semi-permanent, anyway. like i said, things remind me of him. just yesterday something a friend said reminded me of one particularly charming episode. brian and i were staying at a terrible hotel down the block from Little Shitty Midstern College and we were fighting, which is what we did most of the time when he was visiting me out there because i was so terrifically unhappy. i must have been really pissed, because i remember brian physically placing me out on the balcony of our room overlooking the parking lot, and then shutting and locking the sliding balcony door. i sat down and cried and waited for something to happen and then i saw him walk out of the building and disappear down the block. in the words of a very wise and clever friend, that is "not something you do to a person. a shih-tzu, maybe." he came back eventually and let me back inside. woof.
Friday, February 26, 2010
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